In the month of September, I entered into my new team and made friends with my team mates, the “League of Xtra-ordinary Sysadmins” and each one of them can be considered as a gem of a person. September passed silently and October came. October 26th was one of the most memorable day – my birthday. I’m not so accustomed to birthday celebrations, but two of my friends celebrated my birthday in such a way that it is treasured for a whole life time. That day also ended with tears thinking how lucky I’m to get such friends.
In the month of November, I completed half an year in my company. I saw the departure of some of my batchmates in the company. Even the one who was my roommate for the past 4 years went in search of a new career. Even though I was not emotionally attached to anyone, I suddenly felt a kind of horrible loneliness and it was for the first time loneliness made me cry.
December was one of the worst months in my life. I was totally perplexed. Confusions killed me. I saw myself wandering along the streets of loneliness. Sometimes, the hard stones which decorated my path made me fall down and caused my knees bleed. I became so poor in keeping relationships. I started avoiding even my bosom pals and some went away from me due to unknown reasons which made me cry over and over. I was accused of committing many mistakes, which I haven’t even thought of. Silent tears became my best companion. I had no one to console me or stay with me, but I didn’t complain. I made certain strong decisions, but I was not able to execute them because of utter helplessness. I felt like I’m getting absorbed to some invisible blackholes in this life.
By the end of the year 2010, I forgot my tears completely and started to laugh again, but that laugh was also a weird sort of laugh which had the moisture of tears and some unknown shades of sadness…!!! 🙂
Yeah, 2010 was a great year.. Started with my dear gang at Kochi and ended with my colleagues at Kochi itself… 🙂
Yeah, 2010 was a great year.. I got my first degree, I got my first job, I got my first salary… 🙂
Yeah, 2010 was a great year.. I restarted reading, I restarted writing, I started blogging, I started facebooking…
Yeah, 2010 was a great year.. It taught me a lot of lessons.. It taught me what is the difference between friendship and so-called friendship. It taught me to hide my feelings in the interior depth of my mind with a mysterious misty cover of silence. It taught me that love and hatred won’t cancel each other, but can co-exist and drive us to madness. It taught me how to keep intact while false verdicts are made by our once-dear ones and how to reject people who were once accepted whole-heartedly. It taught me to hope for a new world beginning when the sun of wisdom has completely disappeared from the mind of our fellow beings…!! 🙂
And at last, I celebrated the funeral ceremony of 2010 dancing with my colleagues around the warmth of a campfire. At that final moment of the year, I understood one more fact that even if our close ones won’t understand us, nature will, because she is the mother and she can’t stand the pains of her child. My mind was crying because of some unknown sadness which always haunted me during such celebrations. At that time, the nature also wept slowly so as to accompany her child and I could feel it when a drizzle of rain touched my face, just like the healing touch of a mother..!! 🙂
Yeah, 2010 was a great year.. I discovered Anjali Nambiar.. And somehow I learned what life is..!! Adiós 2010 !!
Khuda Hafiz…!!
